-look at it
-send it as an attachment in an email
-set it as your avatar
-tell people about it
-selling it to on a massive resale market with huge demand
-licking your monitor to assess its flavor
All this and more can be yours! Each GRBNFT is directly connected to a series of numbers that we are told is the blockchain, which is an important thing that makes it worth a lot of money. We will only sell as many as there are buyers, so you can be assured total rarity and collectability.
Now that you know how awesome they are, let me introduce you to the GRBNFT initial IPO offerings:
FRONT RIGHT BEER GIRL
The patron saint of GRB, she has led the Cardinals to two world series titles, another appearance, and people get really weird about her. Now you can own this one of a kind image! Ignore the photobucket waterstamp. That's, like, just a pre-release glitch, and your NFT totally won't have it. $50,000, and comes with a certificate of authenticity signed by Michael
FRONT RIGHT BEER GIRL WITH WINGS:
Like the original, but MORE GOOD because there are chicken wings. $75,000, and comes with Fat_Bulldog gravy splatter.
CHRIS DUNCAN HUMPING THE TROPHY
A Cardinal legend demonstrating what peak performance looks like. Don't lie. You've dreamed of humping the trophy too. This super primo NFT is yours for $80,000 and comes with a wet nap.
EVIL MICHAEL
Self explanatory. Possibly cursed. $350.
CARDINALS GIMP SUIT GUY
It's best not to ask questions, really. $30,000
THIS VERY ALARMING PARTY PICTURE THAT TURNS UP ALL THE TIME
A timeless classic! What's happening here? Who are these people, and why are they together? Why is that guy looking into my soul? Poor gramma rallied too hard. $100,000
MUSTARD GUY
Oh [expletive], it's mustard guy! That poor bastard, he got mustard all over! Oh man, what a hilarious situation. This classic image is now an NFT! How is that different than the jpg you've seen thousands of times over your years on the internet? THE BLOCKCHAIN, DUMMY. Stop asking stupid questions, stupid! It's an NFT. Pay us $35,000 now.
DANCING PARIS
Dancing Paris has brought literally thousands of playoff victories to the Cardinals. This is a very rare ANIMATED NFT. See how it moves? You like how it moves, don't you. It can be ALL YOURS, and nobody else will ever see it again, just your own shameful little secret, for only $66,666.
Guys, these NFTs won't last. Unless you buy them and we make more. BUT! They won't last! So buy them! We accept paypal, venmo, CashApp, OnlyFans, brightly colored shells, Rubles, gold bars, and Natural Light Ice. PM a mod NOW because supplies are limited.
