Flying

The forum for ranting, raving, complaining and praising
maddash
is eerily well-versed on Project Runway and irony
Posts: 8508
Joined: June 26 06, 3:07 pm

Flying

Post by maddash »

I love to travel, so I live with the pain of flying - and I could go into the whole routine of just getting on the plane, but I'll stay in just the airplane zone for now.

People who un-click their seat belts before the captain give the ok: It's a very minor peeve, but how [expletive] hard is it just to follow directions that were given to you literally seconds ago. It's more of the principle of the thing. I mean, where the hell are you going to in the next few minutes anyway? Has the belt been bugging you so badly the last 5+ hours that you just have to undo it a half a minute ahead of time? Show some [expletive] respect and leave it buckled around your fat waist until you're told you can take it off.

Businessmen who can't help but talk the entire flight about how much money they make: And they never come right and say it, they just flaunt their fancy watch with its gimmick GPS feature, or talk about what fancy restaurant they had dinner at the night before, or how much this sale is going to make them. We get it, you're a middle aged white dude who wants to cheat on his wife an bang the flight attendant. Why do we have to sit near you while you're trying to sweet talk them?

People who get into the overhead compartment at least 20 times on a flight that's barely an hour long: [expletive] you people.

People who try to exchange seats so their group can sit together: Yes, because this day in age of online booking and travel agents it's really hard to get seats that are close to each other. You [expletive] need to act like you've flown before.

And the best for last - people who hold up the entire line of passengers because they're not familiar with the concept of putting a smaller object into a larger container: You put your luggage in the overhead... that's ALL!!! Nothing more to it. How [expletive] hard is this to figure out? Very, apparently. It's like people are playing level 10 of Tetris or something.

How can people so stupid afford to fly?

User avatar
UK
Perennial All-Star
Posts: 4263
Joined: December 10 06, 6:41 pm
Location: Baseball Purgatory.

Re: Flying

Post by UK »

maddash wrote:I love to travel, so I live with the pain of flying - and I could go into the whole routine of just getting on the plane, but I'll stay in just the airplane zone for now.

People who un-click their seat belts before the captain give the ok: It's a very minor peeve, but how [expletive] hard is it just to follow directions that were given to you literally seconds ago. It's more of the principle of the thing. I mean, where the hell are you going to in the next few minutes anyway? Has the belt been bugging you so badly the last 5+ hours that you just have to undo it a half a minute ahead of time? Show some [expletive] respect and leave it buckled around your fat waist until you're told you can take it off.

Businessmen who can't help but talk the entire flight about how much money they make: And they never come right and say it, they just flaunt their fancy watch with its gimmick GPS feature, or talk about what fancy restaurant they had dinner at the night before, or how much this sale is going to make them. We get it, you're a middle aged white dude who wants to cheat on his wife an bang the flight attendant. Why do we have to sit near you while you're trying to sweet talk them?

People who get into the overhead compartment at least 20 times on a flight that's barely an hour long: [expletive] you people.

People who try to exchange seats so their group can sit together: Yes, because this day in age of online booking and travel agents it's really hard to get seats that are close to each other. You [expletive] need to act like you've flown before.

And the best for last - people who hold up the entire line of passengers because they're not familiar with the concept of putting a smaller object into a larger container: You put your luggage in the overhead... that's ALL!!! Nothing more to it. How [expletive] hard is this to figure out? Very, apparently. It's like people are playing level 10 of Tetris or something.

How can people so stupid afford to fly?
That's me!

I'm spiteful person.

Tarver
Everyday Player
Posts: 274
Joined: July 19 07, 8:26 am

Re: Flying

Post by Tarver »

maddash wrote:I love to travel, so I live with the pain of flying - and I could go into the whole routine of just getting on the plane, but I'll stay in just the airplane zone for now.

People who un-click their seat belts before the captain give the ok: It's a very minor peeve, but how [expletive] hard is it just to follow directions that were given to you literally seconds ago. It's more of the principle of the thing. I mean, where the hell are you going to in the next few minutes anyway? Has the belt been bugging you so badly the last 5+ hours that you just have to undo it a half a minute ahead of time? Show some [expletive] respect and leave it buckled around your fat waist until you're told you can take it off.

Businessmen who can't help but talk the entire flight about how much money they make: And they never come right and say it, they just flaunt their fancy watch with its gimmick GPS feature, or talk about what fancy restaurant they had dinner at the night before, or how much this sale is going to make them. We get it, you're a middle aged white dude who wants to cheat on his wife an bang the flight attendant. Why do we have to sit near you while you're trying to sweet talk them?

People who get into the overhead compartment at least 20 times on a flight that's barely an hour long: [expletive] you people.

People who try to exchange seats so their group can sit together: Yes, because this day in age of online booking and travel agents it's really hard to get seats that are close to each other. You [expletive] need to act like you've flown before.

And the best for last - people who hold up the entire line of passengers because they're not familiar with the concept of putting a smaller object into a larger container: You put your luggage in the overhead... that's ALL!!! Nothing more to it. How [expletive] hard is this to figure out? Very, apparently. It's like people are playing level 10 of Tetris or something.

How can people so stupid afford to fly?
These people are absolutely the easiest, most fun guys to screw with on flights.

Next time, start talking about coffee enemas or tax laws and don't let them get a word in edgewise. Works for me.

User avatar
UK
Perennial All-Star
Posts: 4263
Joined: December 10 06, 6:41 pm
Location: Baseball Purgatory.

Re: Flying

Post by UK »

If they're in coach, ask them why they're not in first-class.

User avatar
JCShutout
MacGyver of Underwear
Posts: 13368
Joined: April 18 06, 7:53 am
Location: South City

Re: Flying

Post by JCShutout »

Why does the seatbelt thing bother you? Who cares?

User avatar
Radbird
There's someone in my head but it's not me
Posts: 62390
Joined: April 18 06, 5:08 pm
Location: LF Bleachers @ Busch II

Re: Flying

Post by Radbird »

People are worried about you, md. Your secret is safe with me. :wink:

http://gatewayredbirds.com/forum/viewto ... &sk=t&sd=a

maddash
is eerily well-versed on Project Runway and irony
Posts: 8508
Joined: June 26 06, 3:07 pm

Re: Flying

Post by maddash »

JCShutout wrote:Why does the seatbelt thing bother you? Who cares?
It's a complete affront to the airplane social structure. I'll admit that when I'm on a plane with 100 some odd people I'm sizing the crowd up, and people who ignore, can't comprehend, and/or break the "rule" in defiance are people you want to watch out for if the plane were ever go down on some uncharted tropical island.

Seriously though. Flight attendants and pilots work a hard gig and get very little respect from the cattle they haul around. To have the pilot and attendants give a very simple instruction and then to literally hear the click of dozens of belts being unbuckled... well, it's a sad sight (even though the attendants are used to it and probably care less themselves).

jim
Red Lobster for the seafood lover in you
Posts: 50393
Joined: May 1 06, 2:41 pm

Re: Flying

Post by jim »

I must not come across as, oh I don't know, what is the word I am looking for... friendly maybe? Because no stranger ever talks to me.

It's great. But that was when i chewed tobacco so I might have to come up with something new.

planet planet
http://tinyurl.com/2e4x5hy
Posts: 24904
Joined: April 15 06, 6:25 pm
Location: St. Louis

Re: Flying

Post by planet planet »

pop_haines wrote:
jim wrote:I must not come across as, oh I don't know, what is the word I am looking for... friendly maybe? Because no stranger ever talks to me.

It's great. But that was when i chewed tobacco so I might have to come up with something new.
Eating a plate of sauerkraut and drinking several beers
before a flight is a super deterrent.
You INTJs are, or whatever you are, especially charming.

Spider John
Hall Of Famer
Posts: 10952
Joined: May 18 06, 10:09 pm
Location: East of the middle of West Tennessee

Re: Flying

Post by Spider John »

I have no sympathy for anyone complaining about their flight to Hawaii.

Post Reply