My situation does not relate to Skip Schumaker, carrying that analogy forward. He's achieved his goal. Whether he achieves it better than the throng of players out there doesn't really matter.
Jocephus wrote:
see, you just dismiss if you dont like it.
does that not make sense though? skip wasn't giving arod like talent. he wasn't a shoo-in to make it to the major leagues...but he worked his ass off and made it. YOU need to work on your self confidence and then you'll attain happiness (or whatever it is you are looking for)
No, I did not dismiss it without logic or off-hand. I dismissed it because it doesn't relate. Schumaker had a chance to prove what he's doing because of innate talent. Yes, he's been denied a lot of chances at what he's tried to achieve for(by my count) around 6 years now. And he worked at it, yes. But there's a big difference between swinging at a ball on a tee or at a ball thrown to him then what I'm talking about. It doesn't relate.
Jocephus wrote:statistics are not the "end all truth". they may give you tendencies, but its not the [expletive] bible ( and im an atheist)
When it comes down to the inherent issue that I'm talking about, I argue that it really is the end-all truth, to borrow your words. I could go deeper but I think it would bore readers and/or would reveal a bit more of my psyche than I wish to bear, but suffice it to say the fact that I am the age I am and yet am as naive I am in certain areas leaves me completely out of the normal statistical boundary. The cheesy line would be "But that makes you unique!". Well, that's not an area I(nor anyone) would want to be unique within. Not in this society.
i didn't have sex until i was 20...(thats what we are talking about, aint it?)
who gives a [expletive]?
you need to stop believing the tabloids (not saying you actually read them...but that whole idea), and believing whats on tv and in the movies. people are not having sex all the time.
sex sells, that doesn't mean there is any truth to it though.
Jocephus wrote:
i didn't have sex until i was 20...(thats what we are talking about, aint it?)
In the end I suppose it is. Though that's not what I'm aiming for.
I could use that statement as proof enough as to what I'm talking about if I wanted to. I'm speaking relating to other people, relationships in general. My inexperience goes far beyond anything you could possibly imagine.
Jocephus wrote:people are not having sex all the time.
...umm, yes. Sorry to have to break the news to you, but yes they are.
Edit: changed the thread-title to "Introspection".
Jocephus wrote:
i didn't have sex until i was 20...(thats what we are talking about, aint it?)
In the end I suppose it is. Though that's not what I'm aiming for.
I could use that statement as proof enough as to what I'm talking about if I wanted to. I'm speaking relating to other people, relationships in general. My inexperience goes far beyond anything you could possibly imagine.
this isn't the death star. ok, so you're inexperienced. who gives a [expletive]? "moaning" about it is not going to solve anything. sometimes you have to be uncomfortable, to get comfortable.
Jocephus wrote:people are not having sex all the time.
...umm, yes. Yes they are.
no, they are not.
but cronos, honestly, i wish you had more faith in yerself. i wish i could meet up with ya in chicago, ...though i might have to literally "knock the sense" into you.
I have to agree to with Luke about the booze whether he was being serious or not. You think it helps, but it does not. When you drink, are you making progress toward the a life you want? I suspect not. I'm guessing it's the opposite in fact.
To expose myself a bit, I actually can relate to your situation quite a bit. I can't claim any brilliant solutions, but you need to stop being so defensive. What you're doing clearly isn't working, and you don't like it either, so stop defending it and try to think about how to make a change. Putting a name on it as some pathology or looking at statistics is counter-productive and self reinforcing. Besides that, it doesn't matter. You decide what to do with your life. Don't waste time trying to figure out why you can't change.
At least get out and try things. I went out and played pool by myself this evening. Pathetic? Extremely. But, whatever. My shot improved from terrible to terrible+1, so I feel I did something worthwhile. Sitting home, getting drunk, and feeling sorry for yourself is a road to nowhere.
Last edited by Arthur Dent on June 22 08, 2:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
Cronos, I think you need to learn to say "[expletive] it." Just [expletive] it. [expletive] it and [expletive] everyone.
When you're alone just doing the things you like to do, do you hate yourself?
The world is a vast sea of anonymity. Other people can't peer into your soul in the way that you can. In fact, their ability to perceive you is tiny. Most people will forget you 10 minutes after they meet you. That's true for all of us. I find that a very liberating thought, personally. Don't worry about being judged by strangers, which is what everyone is until you get to know them. When you're sitting at a bar are you looking around critiquing everyone around you? I don't think most people do that.
You're going to defeat yourself everytime if you think you're always outclassed at the get go of every interaction. But the truth is that some people are just better at faking it than others. In lots of ways we're all just faking it. Why does everyone want to be loved so badly? We want the validation that comes from someone we adore actually loving us back. Everyone is needy and vulnerable when they let their guard down.
Don't worry about outcomes. Just do what you like, live your life how you want. If people don't like you, [expletive] them. Move along. They don't matter.
I got some very interesting replies in this thread, and some good support. Thanks, folks.
I asked Michael to lock the thread, though, because I didn't mean for it to be created in the first place and it's probably hurting more than helping(the fact that I created it, not the replies themselves). It's served its purpose and it's out of my system at least for a little while. Dwelling on it won't help.
