My cultural insensitivity?

[clement]

Okay I know that there are different cultural norms in different places regarding physical space.

But I'm working in Beijing this week and I have to work all week with this one Chinese fella. And the first thing he tells me is that he is sick. Then every conversation we have I find him getting FAR too close to me. So I take a step back... And he takes a step forward... then I subtly shift backwards another step... and before I can get a breath of fresh air, he has moved forward again. To make matters worse, his breath isn't exactly minty fresh!

It's been 4 straight days of this and I can't believe that he doesn't notice me trying to put a little more space between us. I mean yeah, maybe I'm being a little culturally insensitive here, but isn't he also being just as much so?

Thank goodness I only have one more day of this...

[Simbagal23]

You should show up wearing a surgeon's mask and gloves......

Seriously, that sucks. Hope you don't catch the creepy cruds......

[Sutter'sBeard]

Okay I know that there are different cultural norms in different places regarding physical space.

But I'm working in Beijing this week and I have to work all week with this one Chinese fella. And the first thing he tells me is that he is sick. Then every conversation we have I find him getting FAR too close to me. So I take a step back... And he takes a step forward... then I subtly shift backwards another step... and before I can get a breath of fresh air, he has moved forward again. To make matters worse, his breath isn't exactly minty fresh!

It's been 4 straight days of this and I can't believe that he doesn't notice me trying to put a little more space between us. I mean yeah, maybe I'm being a little culturally insensitive here, but isn't he also being just as much so?

Thank goodness I only have one more day of this...

Oh, I hate the space invaders. Maybe he's trying to assert dominance over you. I had an old boss who admitted that stragedy. He was a big guy and he would purposley invade his employees space to make them submit.

[Radbird]

Close talker?

[maddash]

I've always wondered if some cultures are more flexible than others in adjusting to foreigners. Or maybe it's just people in general. Seems like certain people are more willing to withhold practicing customs that may be awkward to others, or to partake in customs foreign to themselves.... while others hold strictly to their customs even when it puts people around them in uncomfortable positions.

[Hungary Jack]

I think this is part of Chinese culture. Given the number of Chinese crammed into its megalopoli, they are probably used to being in each other's faces.

I didn't really notice this much when I was living in Singapore, which is mostly Chinese.

[clement]

There's Chinese Chinese culture and then there's Singapore Chinese culture, and the two don't intersect that often. I was once traveling in China with a Singaporean friend and he got so frustrated with all the pushing and shoving that he practically lost it... called them "savages". I got into a big argument with him about it, saying that it's one thing if he complains about them when they come to Singapore, but in this case he's a guest in their country.

I've been to China many times, and HJ, while what you say is definitely true, especially about crowding around things like waiting in lines and trying to get on and off elevators, buses, trains, and even airplanes, I've never had someone consistently want to talk to me so up close. This guy is really more of an anomoly like the Judge Reinhold character from Seinfeld.. in other words this guy takes it too far and seems oblivious to the subtle body language that I keep trying to convey to him to get him to stop. He just doesn't seem to even notice that the entire time we are talking we're slowly moving across the room as I backpeddle and he keeps moving forward.

[Hungary Jack]

Clement,

I feel the same way about personal space. Here is my suggestion: When he "moves in" on you, move very close and "accidentally" step on his toe. Be sure to apply your full weight, and don't take it off until you see the pain in his eyes.

[Jocephus]

random comment.

im teaching intro to sociology tis semester and we JUST went over social norms and personal space!

[Spider John]

Eat spicy and don't brush.