Rant: Stay at home parents

[Fat_Bulldog]

wart,
Do drugs.

[wart57]

wart,
Do drugs.

[docellis]

I think if you actually "have the choice" to be a stay at home parent, then you do have it a little easier. Some people literally do not have a choice, they have to work, children or no children.

[ghostrunner]

Some yes and some no. Depending on the number of kids, there's a point where you'd be stupid to work because the salary wouldn't cover daycare, or would just barely cover it and then you add gas, car usage, etc..... If we were paying full daycare for both of our kids now, it would be like having two additional mortgage payments. I got a substantial raise recently, but before the summer I nearly quit because of that.

[docellis]

Some yes and some no. Depending on the number of kids, there's a point where you'd be stupid to work because the salary wouldn't cover daycare, or would just barely cover it and then you add gas, car usage, etc..... If we were paying full daycare for both of our kids now, it would be like having two additional mortgage payments. I got a substantial raise recently, but before the summer I nearly quit because of that.

I totally hear you, but you have two incomes, and thus, a choice, sort of.

I can't imagine if you had kids and you had no choice. You had to work, even though most of that went to childcare. One of my friends gets, basically $100 a month to work, after day care. But she has the health insurance, so she HAS to. Her husband makes more than her, but his insurance would not cover anything. So she HAS to work.

[cardsfantx]

Some yes and some no. Depending on the number of kids, there's a point where you'd be stupid to work because the salary wouldn't cover daycare, or would just barely cover it and then you add gas, car usage, etc..... If we were paying full daycare for both of our kids now, it would be like having two additional mortgage payments. I got a substantial raise recently, but before the summer I nearly quit because of that.

I totally hear you, but you have two incomes, and thus, a choice, sort of.

I can't imagine if you had kids and you had no choice. You had to work, even though most of that went to childcare. One of my friends gets, basically $100 a month to work, after day care. But she has the health insurance, so she HAS to. Her husband makes more than her, but his insurance would not cover anything. So she HAS to work.

but would she want to stay home, if she had the choice?

I wouldn't

[cardsfantx]

more to my point...i'd say 90% of the people that stay home with their kids, don't work with them (education wise) that a day care/school would.

i know i'd have trouble...i'd start out ok, i think. work with them on the alphabet, numbers, letters words, whatever age they are...but i'd get distracted, mess around with something that needed to be fixed with the house, internet, tv, whatever. then they'd just be playing or whatever.

the school my kids go to, they do play, but most of the day is spent on socialization/education.

it's helped a lot, esp since i thought my oldest would have trouble making friends, socializing with how she was really young (like i could tell, but i thought anyway)

but still...knew her alphabet at 1 (with numbers as high as you could make her count), knew what letter begins with and sound it out, by 2-3, and could read whatever kids book by 4. so now in kindergarten, we already have the teacher every week telling us that they need to give her more advanced material because she's way ahead of the other kids. our youngest is starting the same way.

and it's not like they are geniuses...they just went someplace they learned at a young age.

i have a hard time believing someone who stays at home with their kids does that. i'd just imagine it's "go play with your toys, do puzzles, look at a book, watch tv, lets go to the store", etc...but no real "learning".

[docellis]

Some yes and some no. Depending on the number of kids, there's a point where you'd be stupid to work because the salary wouldn't cover daycare, or would just barely cover it and then you add gas, car usage, etc..... If we were paying full daycare for both of our kids now, it would be like having two additional mortgage payments. I got a substantial raise recently, but before the summer I nearly quit because of that.

I totally hear you, but you have two incomes, and thus, a choice, sort of.

I can't imagine if you had kids and you had no choice. You had to work, even though most of that went to childcare. One of my friends gets, basically $100 a month to work, after day care. But she has the health insurance, so she HAS to. Her husband makes more than her, but his insurance would not cover anything. So she HAS to work.

but would she want to stay home, if she had the choice?

I wouldn't

Yes she would much, much prefer to stay home.

[Fat_Bulldog]

more to my point...i'd say 90% of the people that stay home with their kids, don't work with them (education wise) that a day care/school would.

i know i'd have trouble...i'd start out ok, i think. work with them on the alphabet, numbers, letters words, whatever age they are...but i'd get distracted, mess around with something that needed to be fixed with the house, internet, tv, whatever. then they'd just be playing or whatever.

the school my kids go to, they do play, but most of the day is spent on socialization/education.

it's helped a lot, esp since i thought my oldest would have trouble making friends, socializing with how she was really young (like i could tell, but i thought anyway)

but still...knew her alphabet at 1 (with numbers as high as you could make her count), knew what letter begins with and sound it out, by 2-3, and could read whatever kids book by 4. so now in kindergarten, we already have the teacher every week telling us that they need to give her more advanced material because she's way ahead of the other kids. our youngest is starting the same way.

and it's not like they are geniuses...they just went someplace they learned at a young age.

i have a hard time believing someone who stays at home with their kids does that. i'd just imagine it's "go play with your toys, do puzzles, look at a book, watch tv, lets go to the store", etc...but no real "learning".

I have to disagree with a lot of this.

Institutionalizing kids at a young age isn't always the best thing. Kids should be able to just play and explore and pretend.

My daughter didn't read until kindergarten and she really didn't need to. She's at the top of her class now but she played with her cousins everyday until they started kindergarten.

[lukethedrifter]

I have to disagree with a lot of this.

Institutionalizing kids at a young age isn't always the best thing. Kids should be able to just play and explore and pretend.

My daughter didn't read until kindergarten and she really didn't need to. She's at the top of her class now but she played with her cousins everyday until they started kindergarten.

I really agree with your sentiment. Unfortunately in many if not most parts of this country in this era there aren't enough kids out and about playing in the neighborhoods. Sometimes day care is the better option when watching movies over and over again is the other choice.