IT's TEH MrSaigon SuperHappyFunThread!!!

[cardsfansince82]

NSFW

[SHOW]

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AsiXurg9 ... re=related][/youtube]

[lukethedrifter]

[/youtube]

[heyzeus]

[lukethedrifter]

Is that the second urinator on the grassy knoll?

[planet planet]

Funny first date fart anecdote

[slide_into_first]

Decoding Escort Ads:

Slim = no boobs
Svelte = no boobs
Slender = no boobs
Dancer's body = no boobs
Runner = no boobs
Spinner = no boobs
Yoga = no boobs

Bombshell = fake boobs
Baywatch = fake boobs
Playboy = fake boobs
Model = fake boobs


Mature = old
Courtesan = old
Gracious = old
Graceful = old
Refined = old
Elegant = old
Classic = old
Conservative = old
Original = old

Age = generally add a few years, here are some frequent exceptions:
College Student = late 20's
Just turned 18 = mid 20's
19 = possible jailbait
21 = late 20's
28 = late 30's

Intelligent = brunette
Sorority Girl = blonde
Selective = overpriced
Exclusive = very overpriced
Classy = can't afford lingerie
Freaky = doesn't shower between clients
Nasty = doesn't shower at all
Upscale = snooty personality
All American = all trailer trash
Princess = I have an attitude problem
Party girl = I'll be high on drugs
On fire = active herpes outbreak
Las Vegas = Bellagio prices, Motel 6 service
coed = plain looking with acne problem
girl next door = looks like the boy next door
Goddess = If you believe this is me in the pictures...
Real Doll = Bubba brings you an inflatable doll, no refunds
Energetic = methamphetamine addict
Down to earth = boring
College graduate = sleeps with professors
open minded = openly accepts tips
two girl show = one girl shows, one girl steals your stuff

New to business = changed name
New to area = changed name and moved across bay
Only here for a few days = staying until bad reviews run me out of town

Up to an hour = 1 shot and she's gone.
Discreet = I check your ID
Discrete = I can't spell
Advance notice required = you'll never get a hold of me
Seeks generous gentleman = ROB for the elderly
Seeks generous businessmen = ROB for out-of-towners
Once in a lifetime experience = you won't repeat
I love what I do = I'm desperate for clients.
Satisfaction guaranteed = I guarantee I'm getting your money


Available 24/7 = my pimp doesn't let me sleep
AD WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS = my pimp can't type
aD wRiTTeN iN mIxED cAsE = my pimp is learning how to type

You won't be sorry = You'll be disappointed
You won't be disappointed = You'll be sorry

CMT = good massage, bad sex
FBSM = bad massage, good sex

What an ad DOESN'T say, is also a source of information:
Unless specified, you can assume:
hair color = brown
hair length = to shoulder
eye color = brown
age = mature
height = short
weight = heavy
cup size = small
measurements = large

[slide_into_first]

[stlouie_lipp]

http://smokinjaycutler.tumblr.com/

[sparks]

Those silly cub fans.

NSFW for a few reasons namely the title of the YouTube video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... ec1cL2X5fs

[heyzeus]