Roaches

[Tambourine Man]

Geen, roaches suck and all but they're relatively harmless. What I'd be more concerned with is the rapid migration of brown recluse spiders to what used to be areas that were once too cool for them. They're in Chicago now and those [expletive] feast on roaches. With the ridiculously warm winter, I'd expect brown recluse attacks on hipsters to rise dramatically.

A buddy of mine was bitten on the lip by a recluse a few years ago, and now he can't chew his food properly. We call him "Slobberface."

[G. Keenan]

Geen, roaches suck and all but they're relatively harmless. What I'd be more concerned with is the rapid migration of brown recluse spiders to what used to be areas that were once too cool for them. They're in Chicago now and those [expletive] feast on roaches. With the ridiculously warm winter, I'd expect brown recluse attacks on hipsters to rise dramatically.

A buddy of mine was bitten on the lip by a recluse a few years ago, and now he can't chew his food properly. We call him "Slobberface."

Yes, but I will be ironically bitten by that brown recluse. It will therefore be cool when I lose muscle control of the left side of my face.

So what I did today was clean out the bottom of the sink and caulk all the cracks and crevices down there I could. I also caulked all the joints around the sink cabinetry which seems to be the epicenter of their activity. I also stuffed steel wool into the larger spaces where caulk wouldn't work. Then I put boric acid all around the edge of the cabinet interior and put some bait traps down there. That should [expletive] the bastards up.

Next I pulled the fridge out and found a roach graveyard back there and killed a couple of living ones too. I caulked that whole area up then put boric acid down on the floor under the entire fridge, then slid a couple traps under there too. Surprisingly there doesn't seem to be any activity around the oven which is usually a biggie but I put some traps around that too.

These [expletive] are going down.

Where that gigantic one came from yesterday I don't know. It was literally too big to fit through any of the spots I plugged up today and I did a thorough inspection. I wonder if it came up through the sink drain.

[stlouie_lipp]

Geen, roaches suck and all but they're relatively harmless. What I'd be more concerned with is the rapid migration of brown recluse spiders to what used to be areas that were once too cool for them. They're in Chicago now and those [expletive] feast on roaches. With the ridiculously warm winter, I'd expect brown recluse attacks on hipsters to rise dramatically.

A buddy of mine was bitten on the lip by a recluse a few years ago, and now he can't chew his food properly. We call him "Slobberface."

This really made me laugh.

[Michael]

Geen, roaches suck and all but they're relatively harmless. What I'd be more concerned with is the rapid migration of brown recluse spiders to what used to be areas that were once too cool for them. They're in Chicago now and those [expletive] feast on roaches. With the ridiculously warm winter, I'd expect brown recluse attacks on hipsters to rise dramatically.

A buddy of mine was bitten on the lip by a recluse a few years ago, and now he can't chew his food properly. We call him "Slobberface."

I've heard about this. Sounds awful.

Yes, but I will be ironically bitten by that brown recluse. It will therefore be cool when I lose muscle control of the left side of my face.

So what I did today was clean out the bottom of the sink and caulk all the cracks and crevices down there I could. I also caulked all the joints around the sink cabinetry which seems to be the epicenter of their activity. I also stuffed steel wool into the larger spaces where caulk wouldn't work. Then I put boric acid all around the edge of the cabinet interior and put some bait traps down there. That should [expletive] the bastards up.

Next I pulled the fridge out and found a roach graveyard back there and killed a couple of living ones too. I caulked that whole area up then put boric acid down on the floor under the entire fridge, then slid a couple traps under there too. Surprisingly there doesn't seem to be any activity around the oven which is usually a biggie but I put some traps around that too.

These [expletive] are going down.

Where that gigantic one came from yesterday I don't know. It was literally too big to fit through any of the spots I plugged up today and I did a thorough inspection. I wonder if it came up through the sink drain.

I hate to say it, but none of this is really going to help unless the slob downstairs (let's call him jim) cleans up his act.

[G. Keenan]

Geen, roaches suck and all but they're relatively harmless. What I'd be more concerned with is the rapid migration of brown recluse spiders to what used to be areas that were once too cool for them. They're in Chicago now and those [expletive] feast on roaches. With the ridiculously warm winter, I'd expect brown recluse attacks on hipsters to rise dramatically.

A buddy of mine was bitten on the lip by a recluse a few years ago, and now he can't chew his food properly. We call him "Slobberface."

I've heard about this. Sounds awful.

Yes, but I will be ironically bitten by that brown recluse. It will therefore be cool when I lose muscle control of the left side of my face.

So what I did today was clean out the bottom of the sink and caulk all the cracks and crevices down there I could. I also caulked all the joints around the sink cabinetry which seems to be the epicenter of their activity. I also stuffed steel wool into the larger spaces where caulk wouldn't work. Then I put boric acid all around the edge of the cabinet interior and put some bait traps down there. That should [expletive] the bastards up.

Next I pulled the fridge out and found a roach graveyard back there and killed a couple of living ones too. I caulked that whole area up then put boric acid down on the floor under the entire fridge, then slid a couple traps under there too. Surprisingly there doesn't seem to be any activity around the oven which is usually a biggie but I put some traps around that too.

These [expletive] are going down.

Where that gigantic one came from yesterday I don't know. It was literally too big to fit through any of the spots I plugged up today and I did a thorough inspection. I wonder if it came up through the sink drain.

I hate to say it, but none of this is really gonna help unless the slob downstairs (let's call him jim) cleans up his act.

I know. My strategy has two fronts. One, make my apartment as impervious and inhospitable as possible so that they seek greener pastures. Two, bug the landlords until they do something more aggressive about it or do nothing, in which case I will have sufficient grounds to break my lease without penalty.

[docellis]

that roach size pic needs to be next to a pack of matches or something so we can see their relative size. Or next to a thumb. or something.

[Michael]

One, make my apartment as impervious and inhospitable as possible so that they seek greener pastures.

These things can survive a nuclear holocaust so I'm not sure how much steel wool will help.

That said, I suggest you should blast Guns N Roses as loud as possible. Perhaps that will rattle 'em.

[New Pagodi]

I think you're supposed to mix the boric acid with cocoa or something to get them to eat it. I don't think they'll eat just the plain stuff.

[Michael]

I bet Geen's neighbors think he's running a meth lab.

[sighyoung]

I bet Geen's neighbors think he's running a meth lab.

I bet Geen's neighbors are taking notes and planning to start one next week.